TOILET PAPER POLL:

You voted gnome.

We're going to throw out this question, as voting for a gnome is illegal unless 3% of the Californian population signs a petition to get an official referendum on the ballot.  Since that isn't very likely, I mean, realistically who would put so much effort into getting a gnome on the ballot, we're going to forget the whole issue.   other votes have been thrown out:   

To reiterate from an earlier poll, Richard Chang isn't from Korea, but his parents are.  They moved to the United States of America four years before he was born.  Chang, in addition to being a world-class tetris maestro, has aspirations to own his own hairdryer.  But that, of course, is about as likely as a gnome making it onto the ballot.

Sigh.

Well, this is it.  Looks like we've covered all the issues great importance to mankind.  Our work done, we'd like to move on to more important things.  Like what you would like for dinner.  And what we would like for dinner.  If we could have dinner.  You see, we (the authors of this poll) are three very poor potato farmers in Belarus, a former Soviet republic.  We are so poor that all we have to eat is potatos and dirt.  But now we don't even have the spuds because the government has decided that the potatos in our fields are too radioactive for human consumption.  It all goes back to to the nuclear fallout of Chernobyl if you remember that.  God knows we do; and the dirt does.  We hate dirt.  It isn't fun to eat.  Not at all.  In fact, its downright putrid.  That's why we turned to the Toilet Paper and poll writing, we were trying to distract ourselves.   And it worked for a while.  First we had to learn English and the nuances of your stupid language.  Then we had to buy a computer.  And Dell doesn't exactly deliver to Belarus, so we had to walk to Estonia where we took a ferry to Finland where they sell Dell laptops (Igor HAD to have a Dell laptod).  Then we had to find an ISP and figure out html and a whole load of other crap.  And this helped us forget that we were eating dirt.  For a while.  Sadly, as we said earlier, we've now covered all issues of import.  So it looks like we'll have to go back to eating dirt.   Forever.